Woke up on the fat side of the bed today

Yup. It's one of "those" days. Can't find any clothes that fit. Even your fat pants are too tight. Feels like everything is hanging out in all the wrong places. Breathing even feels labored. What the heck? The pants I wanted to wear have the double hook buttons. The top one seems to have gotten loosened in the wash, so it doesn't clasp correctly, therefore the bottom button won't stay shut. I tried to MacGyver it a little bit, but every time I moved, the bottom one popped open too. I can't have that at work.

I should have thrown on the trusty "stretch skinny jeans". Oxymoron at its finest! Lots of wiggle room, or in my case today, jiggle room! (Not to be confused with jeggings! These are actual jean material and not leggings--just to be clear.) This shirt used to fit differently too! I used to be able to pull it down around my hips (Where DID those hips come from?) and have plenty of finger space on either side. Now? Ha! If I can squeeze it down around these bad boys, it's a surprise. Today I couldn't, of course. So maybe I indulged and ate that strawberry cheesecake ice cream last night. I highly doubt that a few scoops is going to increase my waist size over night. Wait, is that a thing? Well, apparently it is. I just feel bloated and gross. What the heck? I eat healthy 90% of the time!

But here I sit, trying to concentrate on work. My friend just sent me an email with the wrong use of  "their". Then she emailed back and realized she used the wrong form of the word. I told her "my pants are cutting off the circulation to my brain, so I didn't even catch it!" And that is saying something. I'm completely obsessive with using the correct forms of words, including proper spelling and grammar. I blame the pants!!!! I wish there was a Target or Walmart within walking distance. But alas, here I sit, suffocating in my own fat roll and self pity.

Hope you're all having a splendid day though!